Be KIND 🕊

​When you speak, be kind.

The importance of this sentence cannot be overemphasized. 

Resist the temptation to open your big mouth to ask Aunty Nneka why she hasn’t given birth yet or ask Chiamaka if she doesn’t eat. 

See, this blog piece is different because some of you don’t know how to keep your mouth shut. You wake up in the morning when your mates are planning their day and you toss around in your bed wondering and doing amebo with your friends about things that are not your business and then open your mouth waaa to say to somebody already struggling mentally:

“Better start going to the gym o. You’re already very fat. How will your husband carry you?”

But sister come, is it your husband?

Brother, is it you that will marry her? 

Or you, that hasn’t brushed your smelly teeth that morning will open your phone and comment on somebody’s post:

‘Pankere wo gown’ with your stupid laughing emojis.

My dear, the only comedy here is your life. 

Wise up.

 

In general, I’m of the opinion that we should be careful what we say. You don’t know whose mental health is being held by the thinnest of strings so when you speak, be kind. The way people address matters these days is termed as ‘savage’. But when somebody commits suicide or falls into depressive episodes  because of your ‘savage’ message, it becomes 

‘Ahaan but he should have known I was joking now’

‘Common cruise’

‘He/She is too sensitive abeg?’

Meshionu gi! 

If you could just close that your big mouth, they would still be alive. Are you not ashamed?

 

Words have power, something most of you fail to realize. This power could be wonderful, good, bad or detrimental. The power words hold is huge. Something you say, even as a joke could be the reason someone smiles throughout the day. Something you say and you term ‘cruise’ could be the reason someone decides not to ever go out to social outings forever. Do you now realize the amount of power words hold?? 

Or are you still ignorant?? 

 

“You look good today”

I don’t even know if this is a compliment or an insult. The other days, the person doesn’t look good abi? If you want to compliment somebody, compliment with all your mouth. Don’t be cutting sentences and expecting ‘omg thank youuuu’. 

 

“I love your shoes.”

Now, imagine someone genuinely smiling all through the day and thanking the day they bought those shoes. Happily strutting and going about their day. All because you looked at their shoes and said ‘I love your shoes’

 

“Ahaan this one you’re not wearing those your ugly black jeans today”

Opor o. CEO of Jeans affairs. Were you not given parental love as a kid? To look at someone wearing something cute and different and try to bring them back down by tagging their old clothes ‘ugly’. Just give a simple compliment and stop embarrassing your family lineage please.

 

“Why are you dressed like a prostitute?”

Let me not just talk. But wait first, Is it your urgent 2k?? 

 

 

There’s no need to expatiate on which category each of these sentences fall under. Learn to communicate in kind words.  This doesn’t mean you can’t advice people though. Just converse kindly. A better alternative for those negative sentences above would have been:

 

‘I love the change of style.’

 

Or better yet, 

Carry your face and MIND YOUR BUSINESS.

 

What you say to a person either consciously or unconsciously could hurt them. A friend of mine said something of recent:

 

‘You don’t know what you’ll say that will keep ringing in people’s head so always say something nice.’

 

Has the thought of somebody ever repeating what you said over and over again in their head ever occurred to you? You look at him and you say he cannot amount to anything because he doesn’t have money and then that same line, that same sentence keeps ringing in his head. He wakes up and thinks about what you said and he thinks about that same sentence before he sleeps.

All because of you. 

And that your mouth that keeps on running like tap water. 

 

Be kind. You don’t know if the issue being addressed is an insecurity that hurts or is stressed about and then you put down what the person might have termed as progress and then the person is hurt. 

Everybody is tired these days and going through a lot of their individual things. The least you can do, is to be kind and utter sweet things and then when you have nothing sweet to say, as said in the beginning, 

 

When you speak, be kind. 

And when you have nothing kind to say, keep quiet. 

I promise you, 

Kindly go quiet.

 

 

You don’t have to talk every time. 

Don’t be that amebo person that always has something to say about every matter. 

It’s okay to listen and be silent too. 

 

In a world where everyone is trying so hard to speak above everybody’s voices for their opinions to be heard, it’ll be saddening for you to be that person who gets hard by putting people down. 

Nobody cares what you want to say when you’re being unnecessarily rude and I hate to break it to you but nobody will suck your dick because you’re speaking down on others.

 

-Image from 1stNews.

Dear Reader, 

Something different is not always bad. Something a little violent is not always bad either. Change they say, is the only thing that’s constant. If a little violence and a change in writing will make someone out there realize that kindness is golden, then do accommodate this change. 

❤️ & 💡

-Your favorite constantly varying writer.