Surreal. ❤️

​‘The worst thing that can happen to any human, is to fall in love. But I’m afraid my love, it’s also the most surreal thing that can happen to you.’ Mama said to me, turning my neck to apply shea butter(popularly called ori) on my freshly parted hair. 

I had struck up a conversation about love whilst she was plucking ugwu leaves for dinner and now that I think about it, that’s pretty insane. 

Why was a 15 year old trying to learn about love? 

But the real question is why not. 

The boys and girls in my class all claimed to love each other and just today, Seun and Tunde were announcing that they were going to get married to the entire class. Shouting to all, that they were in love. 

Curiosity sprung inside of me, as it always does. 

‘This love everybody is talking about, what exactly is it?’

‘Mama always says she loved Papa, but I see her crying every night. Doesn’t it mean that this love thing is dangerous?’

‘If it’s dangerous, why are these 2 mumus now happy to be in love?’

I think if it were other mamas in the village, they’d scold their daughters for even having the audacity to inquire about love. Just like the way our school principal, Mr Adio, beat up Femi, the school’s loverboy, for slipping a love letter into Adunni’s bag. 

But mama, sat me down. 

Mama took up the wooden cutting comb we use in weaving hair and asked me to sit on the sandy floor. 

‘Love is an emotion, more powerful than life itself.’ she said to me.

‘More powerful than those egungun masquerades?’ I asked. How could something be more powerful than my biggest fear? 

‘Egungun masquerades stand no chance against love.’

‘Ah, so mama, they do usually beat people in love??’

‘No no no, you must listen to me carefully, my child. 

Love can break and mend. 

Love can bring even the strongest men, to their knees and make the most independent of women ask ‘Baby semo or rice’?’ 

Mama chuckles as she says this. I do not understand the joke but I know better than to interrupt mama when she’s in this state. 

Her palms are still in my hair, massaging my roots but not braiding. She seems to be in a trance when I slightly nudge her.

‘Mama, you must tell me about this love thing. Pleaseeee’ 

She looks down at me and smiles.

‘See, my child,  Get comfortable. I’d like to tell you about the most powerful emotion you’ll ever experience.

 

When you hear of love, 

You must begin to run, 

Do not look back. 

Run, like the wind is your only competitor.

Run till you feel the world underneath your soles. 

And even then, run even some more. 

They’ll call you a coward. 

Say you’re not bold enough to withstand, 

I want you to look back at them, my sweet child. 

And nod. 

 

Because if you do not, 

If you’re one of those who stay behind, 

What you see will sweep you off your feet. 

You’ll experience an emotion, you never thought was possible. 

You’d feel alive. 

Like what you’ve been inhaling is car dust,

Oxygen will begin to flow through your lungs. 

 

Giving your hand will not feel like enough, 

You’ll give your hand for another to hold, 

Give your heart for another to cherish, 

Give your soul because it refuses to be yours anymore. 

‘Take my hand, take my whole life too.’ You’ll hear yourself say. 

And quite unfortunately. 

You’ll mean every bit of that sentence. 

 

My love, do you know the meaning of engulf?

You need not know. 

But I bet you, everyone that has ever been in love, 

Know what it means to be engulfed. 

They’ve experienced it. 

For when you’re in love, 

You’ll be more than engulfed in your person’s entirety.

You won’t be yours to own, anymore. 

You’ll be theirs. 

Fully and surely. 

 

Ask anybody who has ever claimed to be in love. 

Some say it feels like floating. 

But be careful my love, 

The water can plunge you 500ft below.

Some say it feels like flying. 

But be weary my love, 

Your lungs cant handle such amount of oxygen. 

And my favorite kind of people say

‘It’s freeing.’

But my love, 

Even freedom can be choking. 

 

I look up at mama and her eyes are teary. A tear drops from her eye, I reach up to catch it. She holds my elbow in place.

 

No, no, my child. 

Allow these tears to drop. 

Allow me to feel. 

 

Mama’s expression turns stone cold. She’s staring at the rock like it’ll split under her gaze. 

 

I must warn you, my baby. 

There’s a love you’ll feel in your lifetime. 

A love that feels like your destiny. 

A love that welcomes you with all of your flaws.

A love that makes you laugh like you’re simply insane. 

A love that’s stress-free. 

A love that’s honest to you and with you, 

A love that makes your heart feel like It wants to burst, from happiness. 

 

That love, 

The love your papa and I shared, 

That love is the most dangerous of them all. 

 

The worst thing that can happen to any human, 

Is to fall in love, 

Our kind of love. 

But I’m afraid, my love, 

It’s also the most surreal thing that you can ever experience. 

 

Hi, my dear reader, 

I finally finished this piece. It was very hard for me to write it, for some reasons. But yes, here i am. I do not have too much to say this time. I’d just like to let you know, my dear readers, that whenever life holds me in a chokehold, I retire to the work of my hands, This blog. I sit myself down in the dark and read every piece written. I read the comments, I laugh at some, smile at some, disagree with the others. 

But whenever i ever felt alone, 

I’ve been here. 

Now i wonder, 

If this means that my one true love is this blog? Or you guys who comment? Is it a dangerous kind?